Confidence in Yourself

Confidence seems to be kind of a difficult thing to obtains and a slippery thing to keep. You will make progress in one area and seem to slide back in another area.

I know that I will make some steps forward in that area and my life will improve. But then something will happen or some person will say or do something that will cause me a big setback.

It is like anything else of value. You have to concentrate on it, work toward it and realize how important it is.

If you do not concentrate on it and realize how important it is you will lose it.

The big thing to keep in mind is that other people will be constantly saying things and doing things to undermine you.

It is the way people are.

If you can find one or two people in the world that actually build you up, rather than tear you down, hang onto them. This type of person is what I want to be. That is the type of person I want to find and be with.

Sadly, the vast majority of people do not fall into this category.

Mostly they are this way because of their conditioning and programming. They do not realize that they are doing wrong. Some people are even vindictive and cruel and take delight in destroying the confident attitude of others.

Some, like my ex-wife, demand that you be act confidently and then turn around and tear you down with their vicious remarks.

I could not bear to be around her any longer, her negative way of being was destroying me. I just could not counterbalance her negative with positivity.

She would say to me - tell me what you want me to do. I said - be nice. That was it. She could not.

Your life is not long enough to go around telling people how to be, how to treat you. You want to get some space between yourself and the ones who tear you down and the ones who cannot even treat you with kindness, respect and decency.

This is what I have seen in my entire work life. Every job I have ever had is a constant, continual tearing down of others.

Much of my marriage was a slow erosion of my confidence.

We see this portrayed on TV and movies all the time. The tearing down of others is usually a huge part of the story.

I do not want a life like in the movies, where I have to be constantly on my guard, demanding respect from others.

I want a life without any stupid crap like that.

The way I have combated this is to avoid it. I leave people who are not good for me. If I have to deal with difficult people temporarily I am aloof, not overly friendly or nice. I look for ways to not have to deal with people like that.

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