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Personal Development for Men, Issue #054 - Pain
October 04, 2013
Welcome to Personal Development for Men Issue #55
If you did not receive a copy of the my eBook - Fat Man Improvement or The Organized Single Dad when you subscribed, you can get these at the links below.
Fat Man Improvement
and what it means to youUsually your pain is telling you what to do.
Your feet hurt. You need new shoes.
Your teeth hurt. You need to go to the dentist.
You feel tired. You need more sleep.
You feel bloated. You need to eat less for a few days and go for a walk.
You feel depressed. You need to find something fun to do.
You feel broke. You need to avoid spending money.
You feel lost. You need to ask for directions.
You have a headache. You need to take some aspirin and close your eyes for awhile.
Your back is sore. You need to take it easy for a few days and do some light stretching and slow walking.
If you notice carefully, whatever is causing you pain is normally caused by your own actions. Knowing this, you can avoid the pain. There isn't a really good reason to experience excessive pain for the self aware person.
I am in the process of becoming self aware, so I am still experiencing my share of pain. But I am learning to recognize what I have done to cause the pain.
It's hard because some of the things I've done to cause my pain now I did years ago. It is literally years in the making.
I stayed married to my wife years after I thought I should leave.
I have been overeating for years and have weighed too much for a long time.
My finances became out of control due to my bad marriage.
My right shoulder aches from continual overuse.
Since you did it years ago, you will have a tendency to think that it is someone else who caused your problem.
But looking back you will see that it was your decisions that made it so.
My inability to work through the issues I had with my wife early in our marriage escalated until I had to leave. I didn't deal with things early on. I also could have left my earlier and gotten my life together much earlier.
This way of thinking is very empowering but also frustrating. When you have pain, you know you should be doing something, but sometimes you are paralyzed because what you need to do you cannot do right now.
Of course, other people have the same opportunities so there will naturally be opposition and turmoil.
The main idea is to get to know yourself enough and examine your life in enough detail to see what you did that is causing you pain. It is probably not your fault but it is your responsibility.
It was not my fault that felt that I had to continually overeat for whatever reasons. But I did do the overeating and now I weigh too much. I am taking responsibility for it.
It is not my fault I felt I always had to lift so much and work so hard to cause my aching shoulders. But I am the one who did that to myself and I take the responsibility for it.
It was not my fault that my wife verbally abused me so much that I left her. But I take responsibility for getting involved with her in the first place and then not being aware of the problem enough when it first started to do anything about it.
So I am here now. Overweight but working on it and starting to feel and look better.
Weak and sore shoulders but doing light exercises and stretching to feel better and stronger.
Divorced and loving the freedom to live my life almost exactly as I want to.
I used my pain as a guide to what I need to do in my life to make it better.
If you examine this more closely you will see that the role of pain is to point you toward what you need to do. Pain is not something you need to learn to tolerate or deal with or take or anything stupid like that. Pain is a guide to tell you that you have a big problem that needs your attention and you have to stop doing whatever is causing the pain and do something much different and better for you.
Hans RecommendsPersonal Development for Men Podcasts on I-Tunes
Personal Development for Men Podcasts on Podomatic
My Amazon Author Page. My books are now available on Amazon for Kindle readers.
Site Build It This is a practical solution for people who want to build a successful online business without getting lost in a sea of technical details.
Afford Divorce Radical ideas on how to afford divorce. Don't let a lack of money stop you from leaving your wife and improving your life.
Womens Fashion Made Easy You can help your daughter look good by getting this book. It is an easy way for any woman to look better fast.
How to Leave Your Wife To all the frustrated married men out there my eBook "How to Leave Your Wife" describes my story of the verbal abuse I went through and the steps I went through in order to leave my wife.
The Secret of Deliberate Creation is an excellent audio program by Dr. Robert Anthony. I have been listening to it over and over again and my life is getting better in the process. I am starting to manifest good things into my life as a result of using this program.
The Handsome Factor - This is a great resource for men to learn how to maximize your appearance.
Static Contraction Weight Lifting Program. This workout if very short and very effective. You need to get strong, stay strong, and have big muscles. This does not need to take a lot of time using this program.
You can get the latest from Personal Development for Men at the Blog located at the main webpage. You can most easily get the latest news by subscribing to the RSS feed.
I would love to hear some of your comments on raising your kids and life in general. Leave your comments in the Contact Me section accessed from my main webpage.
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